Metaphores & Culture
I found it interesting for the lecture to explain how we use metaphores for abstract ideas, such as with love. It said that if you view love as a journey, then you'll expect romantic and other close relationships to progress and change over time. If the relationships don't seem to follow the path you expect, you'll likely take actions to try and change the relationship to better fit your metaphor.
When take a look at this idea and how it fits into my life, I see it as past love relationships did not work out, because I either didn't allow myself to see that its a journey, just as life itself is, and I wanted it to all suddenly happen, without being honest with myself in understanding that it all takes time. I would constantly second guess myself and think that I had to change the relationship in order to make sure my idea of what I wanted the relationship to be, would actually work out. However, now I understand that this wasn't right, because I wasn't allowing life to just happen and take its role. I was trying to make somwething work when the reality is that it wasn;t going to work because I wasn;t allowing myself to see that it is all a jounrney.
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I really like this book. Some of it is heavy reading but the authors strive to convey the relevance to our lives in todays society.
ReplyDeleteWe all want to have some control in our lives. But ultimately we can only control ourselves. We must accept our role as being only half of the equation of a relationship. You can make someone else aware of how their behavior affects you, but it is up to them to find the motivation to change their behavior. If you try to motivate them by force, it will lead to resentment.
Love and understanding are the tools to promote positive change in a relationship. And the primary goal of that change, and of any relationship, should simply be greater love and understanding.